Right Now...

So here I sit, on this blustery Saturday morning, drinking my coffee, reading some of my favorite blogs (like this one, this one, and this one) as the kids play. As I was reading, I was thinking, "I really need to update my blog. But I have nothing "monumental enough to blog" about." Then I came across this blog, that lead me to this blog, which, well... led me to the following...

Right now, this is what my life looks like:

My husband is on the couch, looking at cars on ebay on his ipad.

Carson is busy stamping. This lovely stamp pad is a gift from our dear friends the Harmons. I have yet to repay them for their generosity. But I must say, as messy as it is, Carson has sure gotten his use out of it, and that is all that matters... Right?

Also, note the Kleenex box in front of him, because he is sick... again.

And the sippy cup represents his chocolate milk that he drinks EVERY morning.

And the homemade blanket, courtesy of Delaine, on the couch that Carson snuggles up on every morning as he drinks his chocolate milk and watches cartoons.

Nick Jr.

Network of choice.

Fresh Beat Band.

Kid show of choice.

Marina

Carson's character of choice.

He loves her.

The coffee station.

Steve makes my coffee EVERY morning.

Don't over look the chocolate syrup for the kids milk. This is an EVERY morning routine. Including the fact that this is exactly the way Steve leaves the counter. So EVERY day, I put the condiments back, and shut the cabinet.

This is what my children had for breakfast this morning.

Don't judge.

This is the favorite toy of the day.

A brand new PIRATE SHIP water table that Brady received from his Auntie Ging and Uncle Stephen. Both kids LOVE it!! Brady actually thinks it is a swimming pool because I found him sitting in it yesterday.

And here's me... Well, not a picture of me because well, it is morning, my hair is a mess, I have no make up on and I smell. But a picture of all my camera equipment ready to go. I am taking pictures of my very first wedding today!!!

And to top off my wonderful morning, this is a picture of the resort we just booked.

YEP!! A trip to HAWAII is officially in our future!!!

So, that is a look at my RIGHT NOW.

Aloha!

The Mammogram

It's official....

I do NOT have Breast Cancer.

Not that I really thought I did, but now I know that I do not .

It's just amazing how once you have had cancer, your whole life changes. I was fortunate to have survived a treatable form of Thyroid Cancer called Papillary Cancer. However, ever since then, I have been extremely paranoid about having Cancer again. It's really a scary feeling.

You see, the first time I was diagnosed, I had no symptoms. I was living my life as what I thought was a healthy adult. Then came along that dreaded day in 2005 when my doctor felt a lump in my throat. Shortly after that, I sat in the my doctor's office, ironically the same day crazy Tom Cruise jumped up and down on Oprah's couch, and was told that I had CANCER.

I had surgery to remove my entire thyroid. I endured a significant amount of radiation to kill any remaining thryroid tissue filled cancer cells. And currently live my life, as far as I know, CANCER free.

Everyday I have to take a pill to regulate my thyroid levels. I have regular check ups. I have blood work done every 6 months. I have yearly ultrasounds done on my neck. And with every pill, every check up, every blood draw, every ultrasound, it is a reminder that I have had CANCER. And every time, as the doctors review my chart, I wonder, could I have CANCER again? I mean, that is why they are checking.... right?

Can I also add that I have lost THREE friends in the last few years. THREE dear friends who have passed away in their mid 30's, leaving behind a family and children who adored them. So, when the thought of cancer runs through my mind, I get sad... and really scared. It's a lonely place.

Then last week when I sat in the doctor's office because I had sharp shooting pains in my breasts... my mind wandered. It wandered to places that I couldn't help but let it go. When the doctor said I have lumpy fibercystic breast tissue, and suggested that I have a mammogram... again, my mind wandered to that "what if" place. Why is she suggesting that I get a mammogram at 33 years old? Knowing my chances were slim, I still couldn't help but wonder "What if I have Breast Cancer?"

So, today was the day. I got to have my lovely breasts squished between the glass. Usually I have them pushed up against the glass, but this time it was a little different. The actually procedure wasn't nearly as bad as I had anticipated. The worst part was going half the day without deodorant. But I stuck it out. Or stuck THEM out. Literally speaking.

When the tech left the room to review my images with the radiologist... I was again left wondering for those, what seemed like forever, few minutes... "What did she see?"

Only for her to return to my room and announce that there were no signs of breast cancer.

I don't need another mammogram until I am 40 years old.

Waaaahooo!!

Like I said, it's not like I thought I had breast cancer, but what a relief it is to know that I do not!

At least not today.

God Bless You

Tammy Herrera

Shawna Kilbert

Blair Weber

I miss you.

Life Through the Eyes of the Littlest Photographer

Carson must have my passion for photography.

He LOVES taking pictures.

And by taking pictures, I mean he LOVES being behind the camera, NOT in front of it.

While I was busy uploading pictures of my own, Carson was running around with my old digital camera.

I was in tears laughing when I uploaded the things he had captured.

So here it is,

Life through the lens of a 4 year old...

His dog:

His garbage truck:

His train:

Ni Hao Kai Lan of course:

A picture of a picture of Brady Boo:

His Mommy:

The Sky:

The BBQ:

The Olive Tree:

My Hydrangeas

(glad I'm not the only one who likes to take pictures of my hydrangeas)

Our backyard:

Dog Poop:

The sky AND our backyard:

The imfamous "SELF PORTRAIT"

Self portrait... Take TWO

Tenaya... Again:

The Sky... Again:

Mommy... Again:

(At least he didn't cut of my head this time)

Pictures of pictures in my scrapbooks:

More pictures of pictures in my OLD scrapbooks:

More scrapbook pictures:

Engagement pictures hanging on the wall:

Apparently he had to go pee during his photography session....

Because we got that too:

His feet:

Inside the BB Q:

The Sky... Again:

Tenaya... Again:

The Sky.... Again:

I am probably the only one who finds this incredibly humorous...

But I am still laughing.

Dog poop... Really?

The Duathlon

It was 6 o'clock this morning. As I was getting ready to leave, I hear Steve say to me as he is still laying in the comfort of our nice cozy, not to mention WARM, bed,

"I won't judge you. It's ok if you don't go."

Ohhhhh, How I wish I would have listened to him.

Even after a trip to REI last night, no wardrobe adjustments were going to make today's competition any better... or drier.

It was cold.

And pouring down rain.

While I chatted with another athlete as we waited for the race to start, we contemplated leaving.

Wish we would have.

Seriously, Starbucks was just across the street.

Damn.

So there we were, at Woodward Park in Fresno... Myself and maybe 25-30 other athletes, lined up at the start line ready to endure what was about to be the wettest, coldest, muddiest two hours of our lives.

First it was a four mile run. A two mile loop... Twice.

Did I mention it was pouring down rain? Well, it was. My feet were completely soaking wet before the race even started.

The first two miles went well. It was a trail run. Slippery, wet, muddy trail. Feet landing in huge mud puddles with every step all while trying not to slip, fall or twist an ankle. The next two miles were a little tougher. But I made it through.

Then, I got on my mountain bike for what was supposed to be 12 miles, three times around a 4 mile course. The course was so wet and the conditions were so horrible, they directed us to only do two laps. 8 miles total on the mountain bike.

At first I thought this is kinda fun. But somehow, not knowing how it was possible at this point but I seemed to get more wet, more muddy and more cold. I kept going.

As I was riding, I was thinking... "What the &%$# am I thinking? This is just crazy. Borderline stupid. There are people in the world that are suffering. Other who are cold with no roof over their heads. People in Japan who just lost everything. I actually have life pretty darn good at this point. So... WHY on God's green earth would I WILLINGLY torture myself to this extent?? And not just voluntarily, I actually PAID MONEY to do this!!!"

At that point I started singing my ABC's just to focus on something else.

With only one crash over the front of the handle bars, I eventually completed the 8 mile bike ride.

As I returned my bike to the bike rack, I asked another participant, "When is this supposed to get fun?"

Next, it was one last loop on the run. Only two more miles to go.

My feet were soooo soaking wet, I actually stopped to try to dump out the water in my shoes. There was no water. I put my muddy wet shoe back on and kept going.

As the rain was still pouring down, I just put one foot in front of the other and trekked on to the finish.

And there at the finish line were two of the most amazing people, Farron and Helen Reed, cheering me on and congratulating me. (Steve was at home with the kids... Darn him. Smart him.) Farron and Helen with Sierra Multisport Productions are the two responsible for putting together this crazy... er GREAT event.

I was still smiling... Shocker.

Then they announced the winners.

I didn't win.

Go figure.

But I got first place in my age group for the women.

WTF??

Oh wait, I was the only one in my my age group.

Shhhh.... Don't tell anyone. It'll be our little secret.

Next up...

Hello, Mud Run???

Can you hear me?

I am ready for you!!!!

6 days and counting...