There I was at Carson's preschool tonight for orientation and the tears started flowing. I mean really flowing. Like hide behind the door, don't want anyone to see me sort of cry.
And no, it wasn't because I was sad to see my little boy growing up and going off to preschool.
Then why you ask, why am I so crazy?
Well you see, here is the situation.
I was going to start Carson in preschool two years prior to Kindergarten. First a 3 year old class two days a week (T/Th), then a 4 year old class 3 days a week (M/W/F), then off to Kindergarten.
Side note to mention: His preschool is ALL THE WAY on the other side of town. Seriously, 30 minutes away. We choose this school because our really good friends own it, it is strictly a preschool, not a daycare, and has a very respectable reputation. No, we don't get any sort of special treatment (maybe a little) or discount. But changing schools at this point is NOT an option. We love it there.
Well, I started Carson in the 3 year old class the middle of last year (2 1/2 years prior to kinder). So, in reality, he had just turned 3 years of age in a class of 3 turning 4 year olds.
Have I lost you yet? Stay with me.
This year, I wanted to keep him with the "so called" 4 year olds (when really he would have been starting a 3 year old class as I had previously planned). But here is where it all goes crazy.
Because most mom's have the same plan that I had, their kids started (T/Th) in the 3 year old class, then moved up to (M/W/F) in the 4 year old class. Therefore, without wanting Carson to repeat the 3 year old class, it would only be natural for Carson to move along with his class to (M/W/F) 3 days a week in the 4 year old class, RIGHT?
And one of the reasons for keeping him with the 4 year olds was for him to stay with his friends who he could learn from verses having him repeat his 3 year old class.
However, I don't want to drive ALL THE WAY ACROSS TOWN 3 days a week!! And still have to do it again NEXT year!! So, I made the decision to put him in the 4 year old class ONLY 2 days a week (T/Th).
And that my friends, is what made me cry tonight. ALL of Carson's friends are in the 4 year old class that is 3 days a week. Not a single one of his friends in in the 2 day a week (T/TH) class. NOT ONE!
Confused yet? I am. Most of you probably stopped reading after the first sentence. I don't blame you. I am going to keep writing just in case any of you are still reading and want to give me your honest opinion on the matter.
Here is why it is such an issue for me:
1. Carson is extremely shy and the youngest in his class. I want him to be comfortable with the others in his class.
1a. Collin is his best friend. Collin is in the M/W/F class.
However,
2. Carson is extremely shy. I don't want to be that mom who shelters him. Putting him in a class where he doesn't know anyone would be good for him to learn to meet other children.
2a. I don't want to drive across town THREE days a week.
So now I don't know what to do.
Is it wrong of me to want Carson to stay in the class with all his friends? Serioulsy, the preschool keeps them together for a reason.
Maybe I don't want your honest opinion after all.
Bottomline: This parenting stuff is really hard.
PS... Steve has no opinion on the matter.
PSS... Suzanne's opinion: HOMESCHOOL.
UGH, no thank you.
Pretty sure this does not make any sense AT ALL and just confirms that I am crazy.
Whatever. Just go with it.
6 comments:
You won't like my answer, but it is true. Either decision you make is correct. You have to do what you feel is best for Carson AND yourself and only you know what that is. While it may feel like the most important decision of his life today, the bad news is that it will be replaced by a similiar situation down the road and you will feel as helpless and confused as you do now. The good news is that although it is difficult and gut wrenching right now, this will pass and become a memory that you will laugh at in the future. The better news is that all mommies have been where you are and we didn't have a clue what to do either! The best news is that no matter what you decide Carson will always love you (and you'll know what to do when it's Brady's turn!)
Bottom line: it is not going to kill him either way. Do what you are comfortable with, because if driving across town 3 days a week is going to make you miserable, it will (a) rub off on him and then you will have a cranky toddler on your hands, (b) you're in a bad mood and not enjoying your time with the boys, or (c) both a and b and then everyone needs a drink!
P.S. You will never get any help from Steve, he's a man, they never have an opinion about anything that involves feelings!
Dude,
He is three. Put him in the three year old class. OR else, what is going to happen next year? He'll repeat the same four year old material? Don't be THAT Mom that is always making their JV kid play on varsity :-)
I'm with Amanda - since he doesn't know anyone, use this opportunity to put him with kids his age.
Also - stop fretting so much! You are a wonderful mom & this little thing is not going to jack him up one bit. Look how we turned out! Your love and instruction as parents will always over shadow little things like his shyness. And knowing who his parents are . . . I think he just MIGHT grow out of that! ;)
For the record...when I said homeschooling, I was joking. Personally, I think that's the worst thing you can do for a kid. But other than that comment, I'm not going to respond because I'm not a mom. Just don't be a crazy mom, stay normal like you are now. For the sake of everyone. I love you!
Thanks Kim. I really appreciate it.
And Amanda, After the 4 year old class the preschool offers a preK class for kids with late birthdays. Basically a 5 year old class.
The teachers at the preschool are the ones that suggested that I keep him with his class and advance him with the 4 year olds. They thought he would be bored having to repeat the 3 year old class.
i have no suggestion for you, i just wanted to say that i feel your mom-guilt pain.
there is nothing quite like a matter like this going around and around and around in your head.
but just fyi, i have put macy (the shyest of all shyests) in a preschool class without anyone she knows two years in a row now, and she did just fine...
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